Caralee Frederic - Principle Skills Relationship Center

Caralee Frederic, LCSW

“Relationships are the very essence of life.

I believe every person deserves to feel safe, well cared for.”

Specialties

Licensed Clinical Social Worker

20+ Years of Experience. Founder of Principle Skills.

Approach

Couples Work

I focus on helping individuals and couples recognize and develop relational and sexual intimacy by replacing destructive behaviors and avoidance of intimacies with healthy and meaningful interactions.

My search for the best led me to the Gottman Institute, a reputable relationship counseling and therapy center that bases its methods and treatments on scientific data, rather than therapists’ personal and anecdotal experiences.

From the first moment I learned about The Gottman Method, I was hooked. I was able to be trained under Drs. John and Julie Gottman and became a Certified Gottman Therapist.

One of the things I love about the research on marriage is that it buttresses up and reaffirms eternal Truths that have been taught throughout all generations of time, through multiple faith traditions. I believe that one day All Truth will be integrated into a whole, and both science (humanity used by God to reveal truth) and faith (humanity used by God to reveal truth) have a role in making that happen.

Addiction Recovery Work

Many couples have underlying addictive patterns, often unrecognized by one or both in the couple. It could be addictions to drugs, alcohol, pornography, sexual acting out, workaholism, withholding intimacy, eating disorders, etc. These are all barriers to true intimacy. I work to help clients recognize and develop true intimacy – emotional, relational, sexual. As a Certified Sexual Addiction Recovery therapist I work extensively with couples battling against and recovering from sexual addictions and Intimacy Anorexia as well as other substances. The evidence based research on how to work with these couples integrates the Gottman method research, as well as research on addiction recovery processes.

Couples on the Brink/Discernment
Counseling

A fundamental assumption in doing couples therapy is that both partners are invested in making the relationship work. However, this is not always the case for every couple I see. Many couples have one or both partners “leaning out” of the relationship, considering separation or divorce. There is ambivalence which must be honored in order to move forward with authenticity. Discernment Counseling was specifically developed by Dr. Bill Doherty and family law attorneys to help these couples. It is a short process – from 1-5 sessions, where the focus is not on making changes in the relationship, but on deciding what changes would be needed, and whether or not each partner is willing and ready to do that work. The goals of Discernment Counseling are to increase clarity and confidence moving forward, based on a deeper understanding of the relationship problems and each person’s own contributions. We discuss all options ranging from “As Is/Status quo” to Separation/Divorce, and an “All In” effort working towards reconciliation for a defined period of time.

Affair/Betrayal Trauma Recovery

We are hard wired to be intimately connected in order to thrive. This is true whether you are looking through a lens of evolution, spirituality, or human development. Any betrayal to an intimate partnership can be deeply wounding and devastating. Recovery from such wounds requires specialized care. Besides my training in the Gottman method which includes specialized training for treating affairs and trauma, I have attended multiple trainings over the years on working with trauma. I am trained in using EMDR and I am a Certified Sexual Addiction Recovery therapist. I use the evidence based lens of betrayal trauma to work with my clients who are coping with betrayals or affairs, rather than the older, anecdotal lens of co-dependency. I find this resonates with my clients’ experiences and is a much more effective treatment modality. Couples can and do recover from betrayal trauma. In our practice, we offer betrayal trauma recovery groups led by our very competent and compassionate clinicians.

Experiences

My extensive experience has allowed me to improve outcomes and use time spent in therapy most efficiently.

In 2014, I began offering the “Art and Science of Love” couples workshops, which were developed by the Gottman Institute. I was the first therapist to offer this workshop to couples in Colorado and Hawaii.

In 2023, we will bring the couples workshop to Minnesota for the first time!

In 2017, I expanding my practice to include providing Gottman Method Level 1 and 2 training to healthcare professionals. Again, I took these presentations to Colorado and Hawaii.

I am now a Master Trainer for the Gottman Institute and offer all 3 levels of training to clinicians. I am also a consultant for therapists seeking to become certified in the Gottman Method.

In 2019 I began to expand my practice to meet the demand of couples seeking excellent care. I now have multiple clinicians, as well as staff members, joining me in our vision: to increase love, joy and peace in the world by teaching as many people as possible to create healthy, loving, relationships and our mission: to heal painful relationships by providing and integrating the best, evidence based therapies available for couples.

I love being outdoors, hiking, paddle boarding, and exploring with my family, reading, yoga and Zumba!

Caralee is periodically available for community presentations to address topics of concern to your group.
Contact her at caralee@principleskills.com.