Shouldn’t I Feel Better Now That My Partner is Finally Sober?

BY CARALEE FREDERIC,
LCSW | CERTIFIED GOTTMAN THERAPIST | COUPLES WORKSHOP PRESENTER

WHEN IS THE RIGHT TIME TO WORK TOWARD HEALING?

TRADITIONAL RECOVERY FOCUSES ON HEALING FOR EACH INDIVIDUAL AND TELLS THE COUPLE TO “WAIT” FOR AT LEAST A YEAR BEFORE ADDRESSING COUPLE OR RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGES. IN MY EXPERIENCE, THAT “WAITING” IS TOO LONG AND TOO HARD TO BEAR.
After years of managing addiction, the last thing a couple wants to do is hold their breath, waiting and wondering when they get to fix their relationship. Dr. Bob Navarra is the foremost expert on treating couples in recovery and he agrees that there is no reason to put off healing the couple.

DISCONNECT EVEN AFTER SOBRIETY

Dr. Navarra addresses partner trauma in a Q&A blog on couplerecovery.org, a website dedicated to “couple addiction recovery empowerment.” I agree with Dr. Navarra’s guidance and recommendations. Sobriety and recovery are different processes, and must be addressed together. He agrees that, based on extensive research, there is no reason to put off healing. Indeed, The Gottman Institute has over 40 years of research showing couples who have the hard conversations do better.
Knowing that “recovery is a long-term process of adjustment for couples and families” and that “The first year is especially difficult…” goes a long way towards normalizing the journey my couples are entering into with recovery.

Read the original blog, “How Can I Heal From My Partner’s Addiction?” here.

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